To Kimani,
I am celebrating our one week anniversary since we met in a matatu on our way home at midnight. We were both coming from our different Friday night escapades and fate had brought us together. In the middle of our perfect conversation I told you my name; Wanja. We talked. I was fascinated by how much we had in common. We talked. I wondered how awesome it was to meet such an interesting person in the drunk jav. We talked. I fell in love.

I am on the road to town hoping that our paths will cross again tonight. Have you ever seen all the Mganga kutoka Tanga posters around Ngara? I had never noticed them but I have today because of   all the traffic. I'm saving one of the  numbers on my phone just incase you don't call anytime soon. I'll have to contact these guys for a portion or spell to get you back. Why haven't you called anyway? Is it that you don't like me because I was pretty sure you did. Or maybe I gave you a wrong number by mistake. My guess is that you've actually called me a few times and I was mteja. In that case I'd like to apologise for living in a place with no network coverage so my phone is always off even when it's not.

Meeting you has made me think about going back to church. I have not been there for three years because I felt like God was betraying me. Why would a loving God allow me to date these shaggy boys from Muratina University? I'd never go out with them even if my life depended on it. Oh! Nie? Digehota! Sahau forget! Now He has sent me you. A man who is loaded enough to treat me well, smells nice and looks nice. I like being seen with people who look like they are from a Buoart photoshoot. You should also thank God, you know. I noticed you were short sighted but since I am not that tall you don't have to struggle while looking at me. We both know that you wouldn't have found another chic like me anyway.

Did I tell you how great you were looking that night? Especially in that suit that made you a walking HELB loan. I spent most of my weekend looking for a house in Runda. We will need a big place to keep your nice suits and the nicer ones you'll buy for me. Kwanza I saw a very beautiful one with sixteen rooms. It looked like Kim Kardashian's. I just assumed we will have five children so that every kid gets two bedrooms but if you want a bigger family we can always look for a bigger house.

When are you going to call me? My pal Njoki works at Artcaffé and she can reserve for us a table next to the footpath so that everyone can see us enjoying our love. I have written my phone number at the back of this letter if your phone was stolen and you had to buy a new one. You could also google me and find my social media names. I'm an upcoming socialite so it won't be that hard to find me.

With love from

My mom says hi. She was wondering when you are coming to bring my brideprice.

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