HAPPE LA HAPPENINGS

A few weeks ago a man gave me a thousand shillings after the church service because he appreciated that I was seated next to him tolerating him for about two hours. I'm only used to shaking peeps by the hand and saying grace. Is this a new thing because I don't have money to dish out but I don't mind receiving cash every Sunday. I tried looking for this man during the Christmas service. Maybe he was going to Watamu after that and had space for one more person.

2014 is finally coming to an end with all the douchebags we dated(mhhmm) and all the pics we sent (mmmmhhhhmmmm). At some point this year I seriously wanted to become a rastafarian. I was spreading the gospel that not everything that comes from Jamaica is bad. Rambo Kanambo is undoubtedly in my 'top one hundred songs of 2014' list. New things are always exciting and so is a new year. That's why people buy new clothes during Christmas and eat with new plates. I probably need a new roommate. The one I have makes me repeat certain jokes then she says, "Ai! It sounded funnier the first time." Do you know how mortifying that statement is? Do you? What I've done is start on my resolutions now so that even if I forget them by January 15th I'll have made a difference.

My reading mojo is also on holiday. I've been reading a lot about women and I got a bit bored. I decided to read Game of Thrones to try and spice things up a bit. The thing about that book is that it's actually a five-book series each with about 750 pages. They use words like lordlings so it takes more time than normal books. So I have started a 3800-word journey, four books waiting for me in the library gathering dust as I read the first part of the sequel. Why am I doing this to myself? The answer is simple; SPOILERS! That's it. My joy will be to torture people with spoilers once I'm done.

I discovered the Veon's blog and have enjoyed perusing it because it's off the chizzle for shizzle my nizzle in the dictionizzle. In the process I discovered that we have a lot in common with this lass who I once thought was a boy. She's as short as I am although I like to think I'm an inch taller at 5'4. Like me, she hasn't listened to Forest Hill Drive. I have it on my phone but I don't have the morale to listen to it. Guys have spoken about it so much I already know I'll like Adolescence, Wet Dreamz and Don't Save Her.

I hope you're enjoying yourself as much as I am. I'm spending time with my family discovering which uncle was in a rap crew calling themselves the Last B'z (lastborns). Circumsion ceremonies among the Luhya community are the real deal because it's an excuse to eat nyama choma and dance lipaala. Happy holidays to you all. Remember if you buy VIP tickets to Sundance I'll be waiting for you on your doorstep with my clothes and my cat ready to move in with you. Cheers!